Day 159: Last Breath:
"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing." —2 Timothy 4:7-8
While reading this scripture I thought, "I don't need a crown of righteousness or a prize." I just want to do what is good and loving in this world while I am here. This scripture, or perhaps it's just this day, makes me feel tired. I do not feel all that "eager" and I am tired of trying to live up to some ideal of what it means to be a righteous Christian. It makes me tired to my bones some days. I just want to love others, accept others, support others, be there as a friend and partner. I don't need to be right or righteous. The word righteous used to be special to me, but now when I hear it, I think of being self-righteous, pig headed, stubborn, unwilling to listen to another's side...all because one thinks they are right and are following God's will.
Day 160: Laughing The Last And Best:
"When Jesus arrived at the official's home, he saw the noisy crowd and heard the funeral music. "Get out!" he told them. "The girl isn't dead; she's only asleep." But the crowd laughed at him."
—Matthew 9:23-34
Anderson's wise words for today: "If someone tells you that your faith doesn't change things or that praying for healing is a wast of time, don't stop believing or praying. It won't be the first time that doubters laughed and were proved wrong."
Day 161: God Of The Impossible:
"Is anything too hard for the Lord? I will return about this time next year, and Sarah will have a son."
—Genesis 18:14
I truly do believe that nothing is impossible for God, as Anderson points out in today's lesson of a woman who was literally on her death bed and yet recovered to join her family at her son's wedding, even walking him down the aisle. I know that God can do amazing things. Whether it is His plan or not is another story. I will most likely always have a hard time with that. He can, but will He?
The part that I am working on is being okay with the answers God gives and not doubting his love just because it was an answer that I either found unfavorable or was not expecting. Bottom line, I am working on being grateful for whatever comes my way. Do I succeed everyday? No, but I am willing to keep trying.
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