Forgiveness Brings Peace

July 7, 2017

Day 184: Secrets To Health:
"Keep the commandments and keep your life; despising them leads to death." —Proverbs 19:16

Not much to say about Anderson's lesson for day 184.  He shares a story about a man who needed to eat better and exercise if he wished to live longer.  He had hypertension, diabetes and hyperlipidemia and was a smoker. He felt as if Anderson was giving him the "Ten Commandments of Health," but there was no way around it. If he wished to feel better and live longer he had to make a change. Anderson told him "...just like the Ten Commandments in the Old Testament, these rules can help you."

Like I said, I don't have much to say.


Day 185: Peace Comes From Forgiveness:
"Jesus said to the woman, 'Your faith has saved you; go in peace.'" —Luke 7:50

I couldn't agree more with the statement that "peace comes from forgiveness." I had been deeply hurt by my father (his actions or his lack of action) than by any other person in my life before. The negative effect that he and my step-mother had on me and all of us kids was profoundly piercing. Just the thought of having to interact with him when he was around my step-mother would make my stomach go all topsy turvy with anxious dread.  Not a pleasant time.  However, now that I have forgiven him, I do not feel any of those feelings anymore. I am truly at peace and do not harbor any animosity or regret. Not having the regret is surprising really because for so long I wanted to have a relationship with my father and I wished and wished that he would reach out to me as I was reaching out to him. You would think that I would still regret that we never had the relationship that I desired we would have.  I simply let him go.  I forgave him, releasing him from all blame, and in doing so I gave myself peace.

I do wonder if it would have been different if he was not on his death bed as I forgave him. I wonder if I would have been ready to do so if he were not.  The thought of him leaving this earth without my forgiveness was too much for me.  I just couldn't see the point of holding onto all that pain. I wanted him to be free. I wanted him to go in peace. I wanted him to know that I understood and that I loved him still and wished him well.

There is a part of me that will always see him through the admiring eyes of a seven year old girl.